Marriage and the Bible - Part 24 - Solomon's Marriage Downfall

1 Kings 11 is a telling chapter about the downfall of Solomon. Because he married so many women from so many lands, variety being the spice of polygamy after all, it lead to his spiritual downfall. He had so many wives that were foreign in their religion that eventually to make them happy he incorporated their idolatry into his own life making altars to all their gods. The majority of which were sexual/fertility gods. This was a direct violation of a command of God on two counts:idolatry and mixed marriage. David at least keep his marriages in the house of Israel.

This brings about a sad conclusion about Solomon and polygamy. How divided can one's heart get about God the more women a man has in his harem? Pretty divided. Not only does polygamy make it more difficult to have a one-flesh/truly intimate relationship with a woman, it also seems to create a God attention problem. You spend so much time pleasing all your wives, you have less or no time for God. There seems to be an ideal that Solomon strayed from that he mentions himself - 'rejoice in the wife of your youth'

One asks, "how is Solomon so wise, when he acts so foolishly?" The answer is one can have wisdom, but wisdom does not give you the dedication and will to follow it. Solomon knew and understood, but his wives robbed him of his will and dedication to God, the source of that wisdom.

If there is wisdom for us in Solomon, it is that marrying well means to keep an eye on the values and faith of the one who you wish to marry. You don't want your spouse to lead you from God.

Next: Rehoboam - A Pale Reflection of His Father.

Marriage and the Bible - Part 23 - Solomon's Marriage Wisdom

The funny thing is that the Proverbs 31 wife is not actually Solomon's idea but King Lamuel's. Solomon gets the credit for compiling the proverbs so that is perhaps why he gets credit for her. Interestingly enough I find more modern women that hate this lady, she is too perfect and that may be Lamuel's point. She is a figment of desire but does not actually exist.

The thing with all of Solomon's wisdom is this, you need to remember it is coming from a guy that is married to multiple women. On the one hand, if your looking for advice that will steer you toward a closer relationship with your spouse in faithful monogamy, he is probably not the guy. On the other hand his is experience in marriage and that experience shows some wisdom.

In Song of Solomon, the wisdom is pretty straightforward. Be intimate and passionately attracted to each other. The fact is there is not a lot of marriage advice here mostly a poem about having a passionate love life.

Proverbs has many lines involving marriage:
1. Proverbs 5:18-19 reminds men to rejoice in the wife of your youth and let her breasts satisfy you at all times. If there is a more direct reference to foreplay in Scripture, I do not know where it is. As for the wife of your youth thing, which one Solomon?
2. Proverbs 6 is a really clear picture that adultery is bad, very bad. Keep sex and passion in marriage and avoid the temptress.
3. There are several proverbs about finding a good wife and the differences between a good wife and a bad one. Given that Solomon had a lot of time on the new wife lot, both finding and acquiring new wives, I think we can trust his advice.
4. Solomon does not like nagging wives and says it is better to live on a house roof in the corner, than in the house with the nagging wife. Once again, given his experience, we can believe him. On the flip side, he praises the virtuous wife and Lamuel's chapter sums up what that virtuous wife is like.

I know I am being a little light hearted with this but I do get a little chuckle when a guy, who's view of marriage is contract followed by contract with maybe one woman he was close to at all, gives marriage advice. But the truth is because he was a polygamist, Solomon would have possessed a good solid knowledge about women and what made a good wife and marriage relationship in a variety of circumstances. His first hand knowledge makes him an expert. You just can't help wondering why he did not follow his own advice at times.

Next: Solomon's Marriage Downfall.

Marriage and the Bible - Part 22 - Solomon - Polygamist Unleashed

Now I don't know if at any one time Solomon could look at the house of women on his palace grounds and say: 'Holy crap, there are 1000 women in there and I am married to each one of them' but over the course of his whole life Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines. I say: HOLY CRAP! It is really good to be king! Or really taxing -- remember it is Solomon who wrote Proverbs 25:24 - 'It is better to live in the corner of the roof, than in a house shared with a contentious woman.' Given that each woman in his harem (gives a whole new definition of this word doesn't it) could have been contentious at any time, I wonder how much time he spent on the roof?

The logistics alone are staggering. To provide for such a group of women and their children meant Solomon made Bill Gates look like a pauper. You had to have money to prove you could take care of a girl before a dad would give his consent and the fact is, kings of other countries were handing over their daughters to Solomon with eager hands. His palace was HUGE. Everyone of them had their own room. This is RICH on a scale very few would understand.

Then there is sex. Talk about a guy who, as he is preparing for bed, could dial up what he wanted for the evening. Blond, redhead, brunette, tall short, athletic build, busty, light skin, dark skin, etc. etc. Talking about the choices might have taken a few minutes. Solomon comments of this in Ecclesiastes 2:8 - "... I provided for myself male and female singers and the pleasures of men - MANY Concubines." No kidding. The point is when it came to sex, Solomon had experienced it all by the end of his life. All of it legal too because he had a marriage contract with each and every one of these ladies. But there was no sexual activity with a woman he probably did not experience. In the end he calls it vanity and useless. Probably because all it ever was was sex.

The million dollar question (chump change for Solomon) is: "Did Solomon ever have a close, one-flesh, covenant relationship with any of these women?". I would say maybe one. The Shunamite maiden in the Song of Solomon is a possibility, but even there the language is one of erotic desire but there does seem to be a spiritual longing as well. However, with this maiden it is possible that even she was not Solomon's first wife, just maybe the only one he really had more feelings for than physical and emotional pleasure.

That said, the motivation for marriages for Solomon was multifaceted but few of them involved covenant. He married some for political alliance, some for financial gain and some because it seemed to be a good idea for whatever reason. Because of his already having many sons, his concubines really only have one use - sexual pleasure. In short, Solomon for all his wisdom and advice on letting the wife of your youth please you at all times, probably never really had a covenant one flesh relationship with any of his wives or concubines, at least not that we know of.

Polygamy my offer the man heightened chances at children and sexual pleasure, but it seems to deny a man the possibility of a close relationship with a woman. The more wives a man has, the more pronounced this is as Solomon, polygamist unleashed, demonstrates.

Next: Solomon's Marriage Wisdom

Engaging God's Problem -- Disagreements with Chapter Three

Now some disagreements with Bart Ehrman's God's Problem chapter 3.
This is going to be longer ;-).

1. On page 61, Ehrman's makes a statement that suffering seems to be random but he says this in the context of the Nazi death camps. Sorry this was not random suffering, nor is any suffering that can ultimately be attributed to peoples' decisions. There is nothing involving chance about the death camps -- they were deliberate efforts to inflict human suffering by other humans.

2. On page 62, Bart also shows a poor understanding, like many Christians, about the Proverbs. Proverbs are not promises or guarantees. They are general principles that if lived improve one's chances of living a better life. This is why it is called a book of wisdom, not a book of promises.

3. I want to restate a point that became very clear once again by the time I got to page 64. Ehrman does not seem to see how humans have caused a majority if not all the suffering they receive. He continues to want to point the finger at God, but almost seems to be glib in taking about man's sinfulness leading to mankind's own suffering.

4. Ehrman states that because of Eve's sin she will now experience pain during childbirth. The fact is this passage actually indicates their would have been pain in childbirth already as it does not say cause pain in childbirth but -- "I will greatly multiply or increase you pain". Some suffering may have been present to mark warnings or trigger certain events.

5. When Ehrman considers the flood, I think he puts God in double jeopardy. Mankind has become completely and thoroughly evil. My guess is that humans causing suffering is run amok. God decides to destroy mankind (which would end the evil) to solve the problem. Ehrman sees this as extreme. God is thus damned if he doesn't --because here is God letting evil run amok again. God is damned if he does, now God is causing suffering Himself to 'innocent people'. Though how a people could be innocent if they are thinking evil all the time is beyond me.

6. Bart seems to not understand the seriousness of entering a covenant with God. He seems to think it unfair if God enforces the consequences when people break their word to Him. What's God supposed to do, beg them.

7. He calls Joshua's army ragtag. After training for 40 years and fighting against two people groups already, I doubt they were ragtag. They were trained experienced warriors.

8. "Every man did what was right in his own eyes" -- Bart interprets this improperly as a moral statement. The context of this statement is not moral but political -- "there was no king in those days" It is actually a statement of the freedom that existed in the period of the judges. I believe Samuel (who was against the monarchy) wrote Judges and if so this is actually a statement against becoming a monarchy. The fact is based on judges that when the people did right wilfully as a group they prospered and handled their problems well.

9. Second Isaiah Nonsense -- I have only one thing to say -- show me two separate texts. Oh you don't have any. Why is it that Bart here will believe this theory without a shred of textual evidence but then turn around and say the current manuscripts are false when they actually represent textual evidence. Seems odd that we will believe something with no evidence but then not believe something that actually has evidence.

10. By the time I was done with both chapter 2 and 3, I could safely say that Bart relies way to much on penal atonement theory as the only way to look sacrifice. I can say this there is almost no consideration of the possibilities other atonement theories might have on suffering and sacrifice. He assumes 'this interpretation" of things is the Biblical one and i know many who would beg to differ. This is one Christian way of looking at atonement, but it is by no means the only one.

11. Israel was overcome by her enemies because they didn't listen to God or the prophets. Had they listened they would not have been overcome. The times they are defeated is always in the context of their disobedience. Bart really tries to avoid Israeli culpability here. Part of the problem is that he believes many of the 'fulfilled prophecies' are written after the fact. But then their is no evidence for this either.

12. Bart asks the question: Is suffering really our fault? He states that freewill only answers part of the problem. He then gives a short list of things he believes cannot be explained by freewill. Allow me to engage them.

a. Famine -- actually famine is a preventable thing, if you do not believe me look at the US. When is the last time we had a famine and it is not because we have not had droughts. Why is this the case -- food storage when things are good (Joseph), as well as learning how to get greater yields out of crops and learning how to make food last longer. Many famines happen because of political repression -- the rulers starving their people. By not being wise, prudent or kind people starve. Our fault, we could do better.

b. Genocide -- Is God killing these people or man? Man.

c. AIDS (STDs in general) to be blunt if people followed God's plan of faithful matrimony sexually transmitted diseases of all types would disappear in a couple of generations. God has told us how to stop this we just refuse to listen.

d. Cancer other diseases -- God told us not to eat the tree or we would die -- mankind blew it we die. We all die of something. Who's fault? -- ours.

e. War -- it seems to me that people make decisions that result in wars -- and people make decisions to be soldiers and fight in them. I don't see God' to blame in this.

f. Natural disaster -- see d. Plus the fact that if we take Genesis literally then the introduction of natural disaster may be the result of The Flood which means: WHO got evil, so evil that God almost destroyed us all -- that would be mankind. The odd thing too is that we all know natural disasters happen and yet people rarely prepare for them like they could. Our fault again.

I am beginning to think that maybe all this suffering is just because mankind is sooooooo stupid and continues to refuse to learn from God.

Next: Agreements with chapter Four